I'll be your chauffeur on a midnight drive. Hats off to TWoP for actually making me laugh out loud with this oldie but goldie:

George responds that he's an "old-fashioned kind of guy." In my experience, that only means they won't go down on you. Oh my God, did I really just type that?

Sounds like everyone I've ever dated. I MEAN, no, I have no idea what's going on. Where am I?