Hey boy, meet girl. Hehe I write like a boy. How 'bout you, friend?

It's the most wonderful time of the year. In honor of the dreaded week, I have posted the following:

Top Ten Signs That It Is Finals Week

10. You've lost ten pounds because eating just isn't as important as cramming for philosophy.

9. You haven't cried this much since your rabbit ran away in the fourth grade. Or last finals week.

8. You convinced a nurse's aide to set up a red bull IV drip for you.

7. The librarian asks you to leave because your snoring is disturbing the other sleepers. Students. I meant students.

6. None of your friends has gotten through the week without a) getting high, b) getting plastered, or c) getting so wired their heart beat as fast as a hummingbird's.

5. You are almost run over by a woman who is talking on her cell phone and trying to study off a book precariously balanced on her steering wheel. You spend the rest of the day angry and depressed.

4. ...because she missed you.

3. You forget what you look like without a pen tucked behind your ear and your collection of scantrons/blue books in hand.

2. You get six hours of sleep daily... none of them at night, and none of them for more than two hours at a time.

and the number one sign that it is finals week:

1. Come Saturday, you're going to start weaning yourself off of caffeine. You'll start by cutting down to three jolt colas and a triple espresso.

Well you can play my game, but I'll put you to shame.

Oh, but I must...

Check out more in-your-face bluntness. It's all the rage with us crazy college kids. Wonk.

It's all right 'cause I'm saved by the bell. I like how, even though I'm older, my life really hasn't changed substantially. I still have the emotional capacity of a fuck-wit. Loverly, aren't I?

E: It's all very high school. I'm like an extra on "Degrassi High"
J: I know, but I figure you guys will straighten it out in study hall
E: Pass him a note for me, k?
J: Sure. Which locker's his?
E: Just make sure Ms. Munch doesn't read it
J: Right
E: #56J on the 3rd floor.
J: Cool. I'll rock that. Is it that one near the thing where those folks are always making out? Or is it the one next to where jenny almost spilled that milkshake all over her white pants the third day of last semester's finals period?
E: Awesome. I'll save you some pizza bites in the cafeteria. want my snack pack?
J: mmmmmm snack pack and pizza
E: mmm...the only finals being state standardized exams.... or 3 page essays on The Catcher in the Rye *drool* It was a simpler time my friend, a simpler time
J: That it was
E: *sniff*