Time why you punish me. In addition to being kicked out of the Swells nest, I will soon be losing my FirstClass access. Fours years of emails will be poof in a matter of days. Alas. During the last meal I had with L(V) she mentioned a slew of long emails we sent back and forth while I was studying abroad last year. And, as she said, they are ridiculous. Here is a little blast from the dating past. Please laugh at it; we were full of crap:

L(V): About the guy thing, sometimes I really do think that lots of sex, eye candy, and the occasional snuggle is about all guys are good for, but I also recognize that I am very very disgruntled/apathetic/too interested in other things to be very hooked on the romance, so I totally take my own views with a grain of salt.

Me: In response to this, I have a new insight on our brethren, the American man. They. Are. Retarded. After spending a few months in France and now dating a...guy from Luxembourg, yeah American men totally suck. They are painfully insecure and fragile, prone to running at the slightest hint of intimacy or, heaven forbid, commitment (the dreaded word! I need garlic! holy water! where's Buffy? Protect me PLLLEAAASSSEEE!!!) yet they insist that we only have eyes for them and when we don't want anything serious, just want to chill out and enjoy their company and not have it be a big deal, they get all offended and can't cope even though it's EXACTLY WHAT THEY'VE BEEN BITCHING ABOUT WANTING!!!!! AAAAHHHHHHHH I HATE IT!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!! Seriously dude, it's such total bullshit. And I have grown a serious allergic reaction to bullshit. So yeah, um, [I] will pass on the American man complex thanks.

Oh. My. God. We are so...Orchid first years who think we know everything about men! Gah run away! I don't know about you, but I certainly had a good chuckle at my own expense.